


Mistakes were made

by Of_stars_and_moon



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Lie Low At Lupin's (Harry Potter), M/M, Post PoA, wolfstar, wolfstar angst, wolfstar fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-05
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-22 16:25:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17666021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Of_stars_and_moon/pseuds/Of_stars_and_moon
Summary: Lying here so close to Sirius reminded Remus of the first time he had entered 'their flat', remembered the warm feeling that had pooled into his belly when Sirius had shown him their room. He almost smiled at the memory. At that moment, while kissing Sirius, he had forgotten everything about the war looming over them, because for that it was just them and he had thought that they were infinite.





	Mistakes were made

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WolfstarPups90](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfstarPups90/gifts).
  * Inspired by [We Were Infinite](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4989265) by [WolfstarPups90](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfstarPups90/pseuds/WolfstarPups90). 



> This is inspired by the epic masterpiece We were Infinite.  
> And sorry if it's not good. Excuse me while I go and jump from the cliff

I love my eyes when you look into them  
I love my name when you say it  
I love my heart when you touch it  
I love my life when you are in it

 

It was a quite night, Remus was sitting in his cottage, drinking coffee when there was a knock on the door. It was almost 9 p.m. He wondered who it could be.

 

He went to the door. As he opened the door, his heart leapt up in his throat. It was Padfoot.

 

"Padfoot?" he asked and stood aside to let him in. 

 

The dog transformed and then Sirius was standing in front of him, clothes covered in dirt, eyes downcast and looking very tired and weak. Without thinking, Remus pulled him into a hug. Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus' neck. They stayed like that for sometime, just holding each other.

 

As they pulled back, Sirius spoke.  
"Dumbledore asked me to stay here for sometime," he said, meeting Remus' eyes. There was so much grief in his eyes that Remus' heart clenched painfully. "And he wanted me to inform you-"

 

"Hey, we can talk about it tomorrow," Remus cut him off because he had a strong feeling that it was not a good news, "You should take a shower first. I will give you some new clothes." 

 

Sirius nodded in agreement. Remus made his way to his room. He took out some clothes and handed them to Sirius. Sirius took them muttering a quite, "Thank you," and went to the bathroom.

 

As Sirius came out of the bathroom wearing Remus' brown sweater and black trousers, he was looking better than before, but his expressions were still haunted. Remus felt a sharp pain in his chest because he looked so vulnerable.

 

"You want to eat something?" Remus asked.

 

Sirius shook his head. "I am tired. I want to go to sleep."

 

Remus wanted to press more, but decided against it. "Alright." He led them to the bedroom. There was only one bed in the cottage.

 

Sirius stood near the bed. "Can you stay with me?" he asked in a feeble voice.

 

"Sure." Remus smiled softly. They laid down quitely, both facing opposite sides, the gap of 12 years stretching between them. 

 

Lying here so close to Sirius reminded Remus of the first time he had entered 'their flat', remembered the warm feeling that had pooled into his belly when Sirius had shown him their room. He almost smiled at the memory. At that moment, while kissing Sirius, he had forgotten everything about the war looming over them, because for that it was just them and he had thought that they were infinite. 

 

Sirius inhaled deeply besides him, which meant that he was also awake. Remus turned to his side, facing Sirius back. He slowly put his hand on Sirius waist. Sirius' hand covered his, thumb stroking circles on his skin and for that moment, it was comforting enough.

 

"Goodnight, Moons," he whispered.

 

"Goodnight, Pads." 

 

\---

 

Remus woke up at night to the sounds of Sirius whimpering. He sat up quickly and turned on the bedside lamp.

 

"Sirius? Sirius, wake up." He gently touched Sirius' shoulder. Sirius' eyes snapped open. He sat up and recoiled. "Hey, it's just me. It's Remus. It's okay. It was just a nightmare," Remus softly. 

 

Sirius ran his trembling hands over his face. "I am sorry. I am so so sorry."

 

"Shh. It's okay." Remus pulled him into his arms. Sirius was shaking violently as he buried his face in the crook of Remus' neck. He clenched Remus' sweater tightly.

 

"••I was back there••in azkaban••and••and everything was so dark•••I••••I don't wanna go back there." He broke down into silent sobs. Remus shut his eyes tightly against his own tears. He held Sirius tightly, rubbing his back.

 

After sometime, Sirius' sobs subsided. He pulled back and wiped his eyes. "I am sorry I woke you-" 

 

"Hey, it's fine." Remus cupped the sides of Sirius' face.

 

Sirius shut his eyes briefly and took a deep shuddering breath. "I kept thinking of you in azkaban. Sometimes it would be with the slight hope that maybe someday you will know that I am innocent and everything would be fine, but most of the time it was with the pain of knowing that you are all alone and you think I betrayed you all and you hate me. At that time I wanted to kill myself. Did••Did you hate me?" he asked, voice breaking.

 

Remus inhaled deeply. "I think I did. My whole life was shattered and I thought it was because of you. I was so hurt and so so angry at you and at myself... because there was still a part of me that couldn't hate the boy I knew, the boy who punched a wall in third year just to see me in the infirmary, the boy who decided to become illegal animagus for me, the boy who always took care of me after full moons and learnt advanced healing magic for me, the boy who made me feel human and loved, the boy who I fell in love with." He hadn't realised that there were tears trailing down his cheeks until Sirius wiped them. 

 

"I am so sorry for everything, Remus." 

 

"I am sorry for a lot of things too," Remus said. 

 

The bridge made of guilt, sorrow, regret and heartbreak of 12 years slowly breaking, he leaned forward and kissed Sirius. As his lips touched Sirius', his heart seemed to beat again, all the scars and wounds of 12 years seemed to heal, the thousand pieces of his heart seemed to mend again.

 

As they pulled back, Sirius leaned his forehead against Remus', staring into his eyes. "I had forgotten what your lips felt like," Sirius breathed out.

 

Remus shut his eyes for a moment because he too had forgotten what Sirius' lips felt like against his, what it felt like to hold Sirius in his arms, what it felt like to have Sirius with him. He pressed a soft kiss to Sirius' forehead. "Do you want to go back to sleep?" 

 

"Can we just sit for sometime?" Sirius asked.

 

"Sure," Remus said. He leaned against the headboard, wrapping his arm around Sirius' shoulder. Sirius put his head on his chest.

 

"Y'know, the memories of the time before Azkaban," Sirius said, "they feel like a dream•••••or like a hallucination•• like they are fading. Can you recall some good ones?"

 

Remus pressed a kiss on the top of Sirius' head. "You remember our first kiss, except for the one in the truth or dare?" Remus asked.

 

"Yeah, when we were all at James', right? And you were going on about how you don't deserve love and then I started ranting about how much I love you and you kissed me to shut me up." Sirius' voice was thick with emotions. 

 

Remus smiled softly.

 

"I remember when I met your parents," Sirius said, "I was so overwhelmed at seeing how much they love you."

 

A pit formed in Remus' stomach at their mention.

 

"I remember your room." Sirius tilted his head up to look at Remus. "You had a chart of constellations, right?"

 

Remus nodded, smiling slightly. "Made me feel closer to you." 

 

Sirius licked his lips. "Y'know, during full moons in Azkaban, I would always transform into Padfoot. It made it••easier and it somehow made me feel closer to you."

 

Remus blinked back the tears gathering in his eyes.

 

"I am sorry, Remus. I didn't want to make you sad••• Let's•••Let's talk about something else." 

 

"You remember your bike?" Remus asked, a small smile forming on his lips. 

 

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I remember Bethany."

 

"Of course you do." Remus rolled his eyes. "You loved her so much."

 

Sirius let out a watery chuckle. "I remember the first time I drove it with you."

 

"I remember that, too," Remus replied. "I was bloody terrified."

 

"But you loved it." Sirius grinned.

 

Remus couldn't help but smile in return. "Yeah, I did."

 

Sirius placed a soft kiss on Remus' lips. "I love you, Remus." 

 

The words hung in the air. Sirius looked like he had just said something he shouldn't have. Remus knew that it would take time and effort to make things work, but he knew he wanted this, that he wanted Sirius. "I love you too, Sirius," he whispered before pulling Sirius into another kiss.

 

Neither of them knew what future held for them and at this moment they didn't care. For this moment, they were infinite.

Love is a weird thing  
Like you just pick a human  
And you're like 'Yes I like this one  
I'll let this one ruin my life forever'

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments would really boost the confidence of this self-conscious writer :)


End file.
